episode 8 - Reconnaissance

He was the first thing I saw when I set foot into BlubbersVale. Blue top, green vest. He looked like Earth from outer space, with a circumference to match. He sat behind his security desk, heavily armed with a bag of chips in his left hand and, in the tradition of all people bigger than a car, a Diet Coke in his right. He seemed focussed on something, and didn't notice me come in. The echo from my footsteps seemed thunderous in the grand high-ceilinged lobby I was now walking through, but I imagined layers upon layers of blubber (this place wasn't called BlubbersVale for nothing) blocking the cavities in which sound would normally travel. Ten meters from his desk, Earth moved.

He put down the delivery menu from one of the pizza joints in the area. Apparently that was what previously held his attention. No words came from his mouth. Just a blank stare. Somehow his stare told me to stop walking.

"uhmmmm... I have a package for Ms. Lukinor Twubber?" I said nervously. Yet again, for the second time in 24 hours, I feared I would be eaten alive. What was it with the Twubbers and cannibalistic security?

Earth lifted a finger and pointed at a little desk in the corner. Nothing spoken.

"Uhmmm... I'm sorry but I was told to deliver this to Ms. Twubber personally."

His finger didn't waver. His eyes didn't blink. Just that blank stare.

I gathered up my courage. He wasnt going to be too happy with what I was going to say next. "Look pal, I don't trust you. And I have a job to do. I was told to deliver this personally, and not you or the rest of the security this place has is gonna stand in my way. You get me?"

The finger didn't move. The eyes didn't blink. But I could feel the fury radiating from his eyes. And the hunger. Earth was going to eat me I swear.

I contemplated making a break for it. Tubby over here was probably slower than a snail dragging a 50 ton load. If I ran for the stairs, I'ld lose him. Then I could run up to the 5th floor and take the lift to the 42nd storey. What did I have to worry about?

"The 5th floor is out of bounds."

What?!?!? This guy could read minds?!? What else could he do other than be fat and read minds?

I shouldn't have asked myself that question. I didnt even see him put down the diet coke and reach behind his tremendous girth. But when I looked at him again, Earth had already drawn his gun.

"I can shoot troublemakers like you. And at this range, I DO NOT miss."

I doubted he would really shoot me. I didnt think he'ld want to disflavour his dinner with the bitter taste of gunpowder. I weighed my options. I could leave, or I could stay. Leaving would mean I walk out the door. Staying would mean 6 men would be carrying me to my grave tomorrow in a wooden box. I decided on the former.

"ok, ok, I'm going." God, Security people could be such a pain. I left Blubbersvale and headed back to my car.

What had I learned from today's recon? Nothing other than what I already should have guessed. There was no chance I was going to get to Lukinor's apartment through the front door. I needed another way in. I picked up my mobile phone. I had a plan.

"Mr. Twubber, I'm going to need a favour."